“You are not a leader to win a popularity contest, you are a leader to lead.” – Jack Welch
Jay Ledesma
As a leader, there is one question that you should ask yourself: Do you want to be a leader who is popular or a leader who is respected?
It is an innate human desire to be liked, to be accepted. No one wants to be rejected. Leaders are not exempted from that. Many leaders want to be liked, that they often fall into the trap of making decisions based on what will be popular instead of what is right. This is the case for most of our political leaders, who were voted into office because of their popularity and not because of their platforms and programs. Now that they’re in the office, they avoid making tough decisions that are needed but considered unpopular with their potential voters. Because of the desire to be liked by their followers, many leaders tend to be lenient, not holding people accountable or bending rules or giving preferential treatment. Do any of these and you’ll end up a mediocre leader, at best.
One of the leadership lessons I learned and applied was no matter what we do, we can never please everybody. There will always be one party whose interest will not be served by my decision. So I just to stick to doing what is right and accept the fact that some people will not be happy about it. Doing this made my role as a leader less stressful. The moment you attempt to please everybody, that could be a challenging leadership journey.
Many of our great leaders were not always liked. I have worked with some of them. They know that as a leader, they have to focus on achieving the mission ahead of their desire to be liked, which can sometimes lead to disagreement with their people and taking a stand that can be unpopular. But still I consider them great leaders whom I respect, learned so much from and would love to work with, again.
What makes them respected, though not always liked, is their work principle of doing what is right while still involving and empowering their people. Though their decisions may not be popular with the majority, they have this ability to communicate, engage and align their subordinates (employees) to the mission and goals of the team and organization. Leaders are almost always not liked when tough decisions are made. But when followers see and feel the sincerity and authenticity of the boss, they will eventually accept the decision. Be open and honest. Let underperformers know when and how they are underperforming. Generously praise your top performers . Just be truthful. Sometimes, it’s not about the message but the messenger that matters.
Respected Leaders focus on building positive working relationships with their people, foster teamwork and are sensitive to the sentiments of their people. They may be tough but they are fair, just and consistent with everyone. Which is sometimes challenging, especially when you are friends with your subordinates. This is a common dilemma of leaders who rose from the ranks. As some of your subordinates may be your former equals (and friends), it is very important that you will not be perceived by others as a leader who plays “favorites” and gives preferential treatment. Being popular with your “favored” people will not sustain you as a leader. But being fair and consistent in the application of your decision and your rules, regardless who might be affected, will lead to high morale, promote trust and camaraderie in your team. These are what leaders need to deliver results.
Another trait of respected leaders is they create a “speak up” culture in the team. They may have made their decisions but they still let their people voice their opinions and give suggestions. They are not out there to prove that their people are wrong, even if their ideas differ from each other. Instead, they listen and look at things from a different perspective. If they can implement some of the suggestions, they do so. But if they can’t, these leaders make an effort to explain to their people the reason why their suggestions cannot be considered at the moment. They create an atmosphere where intelligent and well-meaning individuals feel safe to engage in healthy discussions and disagreements.
Respect begets respect. Great leaders are respected because they are respectful to other people. Treat your people well and they’ll treat you well too. Treat them harshly and they will be twice as harsh to you. See and recognize the best in people. Help them harness their strengths and potentials. Help them achieve their goals and they’ll happily and willingly help you achieve yours. But being kind does not translate to being weak. Being compassionate doesn’t mean that you cannot be resolute and firm when situation calls for it. Great leaders know how to balance between being tender yet tough, soft yet strong and friendly yet firm. When there is respect in the team, people will work hard and perform well, whether they like/agree with their leader or not.
Leadership can be tough and challenging. But when you lead from a position of being fair, doing what’s right and getting things done, being popular is the least of your concern. Let’s be mindful to do the right thing rather than doing the popular thing.